When I published my last blog, I announced that the next entry would either be called The Big Goodbye or The Backslide.
At that time, it was still possible for me to change my mind about going on the road. I have lived in Belgrade for more years than anywhere else in the world. Despite that my two books published here were called Grumpy in Belgrade, I have not been grumpy here. Not overly so.
I have seen this country emerge from very dark and confusing times into its modern European iteration. So much has changed in these years that younger readers would never believe the changes if I were to catalog them.
And while I am not completely leaving Serbia (I will be back often), I will be away for long periods from now on. When people ask me about it, they are less interested in knowing what I am doing or where it will be. They want to know why.
So?
I am happy to explain the Why to the extent that I can. But “why” is a very hard question because the answer never ceases expanding, morphing, transforming, and adapting. The reasons I wanted to do this five years ago (!) are different from my reasons today.
I find that “why” is also among the most intrusive questions because I dislike stock or standard responses. A standard response to a why question usually points the finger at someone or something to allow the asker to nod and say, “Oh…”
Why did you move to Serbia?
To get married.
Oh…
A standard response does not require further digging. It is enough to give the asker enough information to say to themselves, “Oh, if it had been me in the same situation, I would have done the same thing.” Problematically, very few of the things that I have done in my life fall squarely into that category.
This is how “why” becomes intrusive. To give a good answer, I should delve into the perilous depths of my psyche and draw forth intimate information that – let’s face it – no one really wants to hear anyway. It’s like the guy who insists on giving you a full and unexpurgated explanation to the query how are you. You could just say “fine”. It’s enough.
“Fine.”
The Question
Q: Why are you giving up a stable life in Serbia, where you have been for so many years, to become a digital nomad? Why would you choose uncertainty?
I do not choose uncertainty. It is already everywhere.
My life in Belgrade has been fairly easy, for the most part. It is an easy and comfortable place to live as long as you are fine to maintain the status quo. Day after day, everything the same, the routines refined, the timing precise. It is a goal that many would like to achieve. There are so many people whose day to day life is unpredictable – this is a traumatic way to live: on the possible verge of crisis but not knowing when it will strike or how.
Yet this person is more prepared for the uncertainty in the world. The calm, habit-bound, comfortable person is not equipped for uncertainty or unpredictability, and even a small crisis can be disastrous. We live in a bubble of illusory certainty, knowing that if we keep strictly to our routines, nothing will ever disturb them.
Not so. Obviously.
What I choose is not uncertainty, but rather it is the certainty that change will happen, that patterns can be broken, habits altered, and that we need neither for a happy life. My goal is to prove whether this statement holds true for me.
My work will come with me. I will, no matter where I am, work with people in their needs and through their questions as a Life Coach. I will continue to work with companies and clients on their branding. And I will continue to teach as opportunities arise.
In this sense, there is no Big Goodbye, only a change in backdrop. I will continue to be the same distance from my clients, friends, and family that I have been for every year since social media: approximately 60cm. The distance from my eye to the screen.
No Big Goodbye
This is surely the last blog post to go up from my desk in Belgrade. When I sit down to do this again, I will be in Bacolod City. But this is not a swan song, not a Big Goodbye. I expect that will have new perspectives, and new subjects to discuss, but in many ways, it will just be what is next. Because what is next always follows what was before.
And now…